


And Then Continue

by EgregiousDerp



Category: Naruto
Genre: Awkwardness and Feelings, Explicit Consent, M/M, Porn Without Plot, while staring caringly into Lee’s eyes, ’I don’t know that I can care’ Gaara says as he cares deeply
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:21:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25882015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EgregiousDerp/pseuds/EgregiousDerp
Summary: Sweat dripped off Lee’s bangs. A droplet of salt hitting Gaara in the scar, making him blink, making him stare up at Lee in surprise.Lee, who was so close he could feel the warmth coming off of him, but barely touching-Gaara considered the face that had shifted back into his view. The strong features and then the emotion on them.Lee’s mouth was slack, eyes tightly shut, and eyebrows slightly lifted as though he was searching for something extraordinary, something beyond just the play of two bodies, the mutual display of trust.
Relationships: Gaara/Rock Lee
Comments: 31
Kudos: 131





	And Then Continue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [a_gay_poster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_gay_poster/gifts).



> I forgot time was a thing and really wanted to make a birthday present for Greyson. (A_gay_Poster)
> 
> So I wrote some. Uh. Porn. 😐
> 
> ...in my defense, I remember a summary where SOMEONE wanted more consensual stuff in the Gaara and Lee tag and this is probably the closest I get to fluff.
> 
> Testimonials from Greyson:
> 
> “I’ve been STABBED.”

Gaara breathed out, feeling the weight of Lee’s hands around his wrists, the heady gust of respondent breath under his tipped-up chin, the unspoken battle lost. Surrendered, the body laid forfeit. The relentless, slow, inexorably claiming motion was like the desert licking at the rain boundaries of Konoha, shaped every year by new wind, embraced every year by new wind.

Gaara tipped his head up a little higher, shivering a little at motion, the slow, building swell of sensation from Lee’s movement and the shudder that accompanied it, noted and yet not overwhelming.

Not _yet._ If everything he’d read was right. Though he had his doubts. Such things could go either way really.

His fingers flexed.

Sweat dripped off Lee’s bangs. A droplet of salt hitting Gaara in the scar, making him blink, making him stare up at Lee in surprise.

_Lee_ , who was so close he could feel the warmth coming off of him, but barely touching-

Gaara considered the face that had shifted back into his view. The strong features and then the emotion on them.

Lee’s mouth was slack, eyes tightly shut, and eyebrows slightly lifted as though he was searching for something extraordinary, something beyond just the play of two bodies, the mutual display of trust.

Gaara frowned.

The sensation of Lee moving within him was thrilling, new, but hardly uncontrollable. Hardly the thing he’d heard so much about. It was a manageable sort of pleasant. Agreeable enough. He wouldn’t refuse if the offer came up again. But it was hardly earth-shattering. He considered Lee’s expression, then he stared at the ceiling for a moment, then he watched Lee’s concentrated expression for a bit longer.

Gaara’s fingers twitched again.

“Lee,” He said.

Lee cracked open an eye immediately, jolting to a halt.

“What?! Yes?! _Did I hurt you_ -?!”

“No,” Gaara sighed. “You aren’t hurting me. It feels fine.”

Lee sagged in relief, his hanging bangs brushing Gaara’s forehead. His eyes were frantic, searching.

“Do you- uhm. Require more lubricant?”

Gaara shifted slightly.

“No,” he said. He wasn’t sure he’d know one way or the other there. Though the question did make him a little curious.

Lee’s adam’s apple worked.

“Is it...not very good?” He whispered.

Gaara blinked.

The fragility in Lee’s expression, the expectation he was failing at something was heartbreaking.

Gaara knew there wasn’t going to be an answer good enough for that. He shifted slightly.

“Let go of my hands. I want to touch you,” he said instead.

Lee scrambled to comply with an immediate apology, shrinking back.  
  


Gaara stilled him with a touch of his face, drawing him down for a kiss, mimicking the way Lee had taught him to move his mouth, to taste with his tongue, to explore.

He felt some of the tension leave Lee’s shoulders as he kissed him, though he still hunched, like he expected to be stopped, expected in some vital way to fall short, or be kicked out of his own room.

As if Gaara hadn’t made the choice to come to him.

As if they hadn’t spoken very frankly about this. 

Well. _Gaara_ had spoken frankly about it. And had firmly drawn Lee back to the topic every time Lee tried to stammer his way out or insist that people didn’t just _ask_ things like this. But it had been a very clear and extremely consensual agreement, and it wasn’t unpleasant. And Lee himself was certainly far from unpleasant.

Gaara studied him again more closely, Lee’s breath close enough to waft over his face.

Lee’s naked brown body was extremely attractive as Gaara glanced down it. Strong, certainly. Resilient. But somehow coiled with lively energy just waiting to be tapped into. He dragged his gaze up and noted again how Lee’s dark eyes were very large, capable of so much emotion, so much warmth, so much zeal. They were fixed on the bedding over Gaara’s shoulder, broad shoulders still scrunched up around his ears, little mouth worrying at itself.

Gaara ran a thumb thoughtfully over one heavy eyebrow as Lee stammered.

“We may still stop at any time if you are- uhm. Having second thoughts about-“

“I’m not,” Gaara cut Lee off. “I just wanted to touch you.” He paused. This was a workably pleasant experience for him, but maybe his body was incapable of bringing pleasure just like it was maybe incapable of bringing love. Consideration of one’s partner or partners had been a part of most of what he’d read. He leaned toward consideration at the thought. “Are _you?_ ”

“What?!” Lee squeaked.

“Are _you_ alright?” Gaara contemplated their bodies again. The warm brownness of Lee. The strength waiting to erupt. “Would you like to stop?”

“I-“ Lee shifted, squirming in place. “It is just- I cannot help but notice there are many far more attractive and capable Shinobi around you who could teach you-“

Gaara sighed.

This again.

“I don’t want them,” he interrupted.

Lee quieted, staring into the rumpled sheets, his intense expression somehow even more concentrated with misery than before, knobby fingers gripping Gaara’s knees.

Gaara touched his hand, then Lee’s leg, lightly. More firmly when Lee didn’t look at him immediately.

“I want _you._ ”

Lee looked away even harder.

His cock twitched at that, Gaara noticed. Though Lee seemed embarrassed by it, mouth scrunching you even smaller.

“Can I touch you?” Gaara whispered.

“Wh-? If- If you _want_ to-“

“I do.”

Lee opened his mouth. Closed it. His face heated even under Gaara’s stare.

He nodded mutely, shivering when Gaara traced the damp of his foreskin, the soft skin of his shaft, settled his palm against Lee’s belly, observing the way Lee’s enormous eyes closed tightly, the grimace of his curving lips.

Gaara nodded to himself.

“We should continue. If it’s satisfactory for you-“

“Oh, yes! You feel-“ Lee blurted, shutting his mouth quickly, the red reaching his ears, which Gaara had uncovered and was rubbing a thumb along, pulling himself up. “Th-That is- it is- very good.” Lee finished lamely. “If that is okay-“

Gaara leaned so he could put his lips against Lee’s ear. “Yes. You feel good inside of me.”

The flush crept down Lee’s chest and shoulders, hot blood staining under his skin like it was sinking into sand. He shrank back.

“You cannot just _say_ -“

“I just did,” Gaara murmured, chasing the shrinking back ear.

Lee huffed.

“ _Gaara_ -”

“Lee,” Gaara murmured, the name a definitive end to the argument as far as he was concerned, brushing Lee’s ear with his lips. The skin of his sides was softer than the rest of him, a bundle of different textures of scar, skin, muscle.

Lee sighed.

  
Gaara looked over his body again.

Lee’s nipples looked very tight, a deeper brown than the rest of his golden skin, which was tanner in stripes and bits, paler where his wraps began, peppered with dark and with light scars.

He moaned when Gaara tweaked one experimentally, half-crawling up into his lap.

Their cocks brushed against one another and Gaara felt Lee shudder.

“ _Continue_ ,” Gaara breathed into his ear, knees on either side of Lee’s hips now.

Lee made an _mm_ noise that was probably agreement.

He could feel the heat of Lee’s skin like this, warm against the inner skin of his thighs, his belly, Lee’s peaked nipples dragging against his skin. He rocked slightly against him because it felt right to, right to lean and push against the blood-warmed body against him, right to enclose Lee in his arms, and be enclosed by Lee’s in return.

Lee’s exhale was shaken.

“Are you certain you-?”

“Yes,” Gaara muttered, impatiently. “Get on with it.”

He felt Lee shifting, fumbling with himself, then the push of the blunt width of him, the motion up and _in._

The _heat_.

Gaara absently nosed into Lee’s shoulder, tasting the sweat of him with an idle lap of his tongue at Lee’s throat, A suck of salt. The rougher angle was shocking and thrilling all at once as Lee began to move again, shallow motions pressing gently at first, and then gradually working _deep_ so Gaara’s breath went similarly shallow, hips tilting back instinctively.

He sucked in a breath as Lee’s hands found his hips, guiding him, caught a whiff of sweat, of Lee’s dated cologne.

That was _better_ , in some strange undefinable way that could have been how much more contact he had with the heat of Lee’s skin, or the feeling of his breath shuddering in his ear, or the way he felt _deep_ and _big_ inside of Gaara the same way his very careful, very polite fingers _hadn’t_ when Lee had so gently worked him open and had pressed thrilling butterfly kisses all along Gaara’s shaft and along his heavy balls.

It had been nice being touched by Lee. Being cautiously kissed.

Lee was gentle. So very gentle. So careful when he’d rolled a pillow under Gaara’s back, laying soft towels beneath him. The meticulousness of it had been fundamentally pleasing to Gaara in a way.

But he’d barely even been touching him, drawn back up on his elbows like he was afraid to rest his weight on Gaara, touching only at the point where his cock had vanished into Gaara. Like this was some number of different pushups to do. Some self-rule. This was better, Gaara thought, rubbing himself all up against the warmth of the seated Lee, straddling him, Lee’s strong, contained body pressed firm and deep inside of him. The smell and warmth of another human being…

Gaara nipped with his teeth and felt Lee shudder against him.

Gaara breathed in, and _moved._

The dull pleasure intensified as he rolled his hips experimentally, then more sharply, quickening the sensation of Lee shifting inside him.

Lee gasped, fingers tightening on Gaara’s hips, trying to slow him, push him back.

Gaara shook his head.

“I do not want to hurt y-“

“You won’t,” Gaara murmured against his lips, catching Lee’s mouth in a kiss. “Lee. You _won’t_.”

Lee’s little mouth scrunched more tightly, uncertain. 

Gaara dragged his fingers up and down the scarring all over Lee’s misshapen, permanently discolored left arm.

“Am I hurting _you_ in this position?”

Lee made a noise of confusion, then seemed to catch up on the question. He gave a watery smile.

“ _No_ ! Certainly not! It is just- Uhm. Gaara, you are _sure_ that you are alright?”

“Yes,” Gaara murmured back, rubbing his cheek against the damp crook of Lee’s neck, tracing the muscles of his back with his fingernails and then with the pads of his fingers. “It’s better like this.”

“It- it is?”

Gaara hummed in agreement.

“I can feel you better.”

“ _Oh_ ,” Lee’s cheeks flamed and he stared fixedly down at the bed, over Gaara’s shoulder.

Gaara ran his thumbs in little circles around Lee’s tight brown nipples, watching his brows unknit, and his long lashes lower.

“ _Mm._ ”

“Is that good?”

“Yes, that is-“ Lee shivered. “That feels _very_ good. You are uhm- very good.”

Gaara hummed thoughtfully and drew his forefingers down in a little experimental pinch, tugging a nipple.

“Good.”

He felt Lee _twitch_ inside of him, felt as much as he heard him groan, the little thrilling jerk of a slightly harder thrust that made his breath catch.

_He liked that._

Gaara kissed him again, coaxing Lee’s mouth open, twisting and worrying at his nipple with his fingers while his tongue pushed inside, grazing Lee’s in a pantomime of Lee’s hardness inside him.

Lee made a little noise, his heavy brows unknitting immediately.

He seemed lost when Gaara pulled back.

“ _Harder,_ ” Gaara whispered against Lee’s slack lips.

Lee breathed out in a shudder.

His hands found Gaara’s ass, drew him up just a little on his knees, and he obeyed.

Gaara _gasped._

Lee stilled immediately.

“Are-“

“ _Yes.”_

“Like th-?”

“Yes. Just like that,” He breathed into Lee’s neck, the noise of impatience turning into a startled one.

His toes curled with a jerk. What was _that_?

Lee did it again, and Gaara jolted, shocked.

“ _Ah_ -“

Lee hesitated.

“Too rough?”

“ _No_ ,” Gaara whispered. “Keep go- _ah_...”

The sharp spike of pleasure spread into a warmth all across the back of Gaara’s hipbones, melting into him. He shuddered, dropping his head against Lee’s shoulder, burying both his hands in Lee’s silky hair.

He bit his lip, arching as Lee slowed his graze along that pleasure point deep inside him.

“ _Lee_...”

Lee’s eyes were soft and wondering on him when he opened his back up.

“Is that good?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Gaara whispered, feeling his heart pounding like he was running a race, like he was fighting, his chakra building and spooling up in a knot behind his navel, the rough hot flicker of Lee’s all around him-

- _inside_ him.

The slow deep rolling of Lee’s hips drew sounds from between his lips, soft, low noises that Gaara couldn’t hold back if he tried.

He tipped his head back, rocking instinctively with a groan. Sweat broke out in little pinpricks against his hairline.

“Can I kiss you?” Lee whispered after a few blissful seconds of motion.

He sounded awestruck, strangely reverent, eyes moist.

Gaara exhaled in a rush.

“ _Yes_.”

_Of course you can._

Lee’s lips found his forehead, his cheek.

“ _Don’t stop,”_ Gaara shuddered.

His cock was wet against the ridge of Lee’s abs, the heat of his body not enough to do more than just tease.

“Don’t- _ah-_ “

Lee’s lips found his chin.

Gaara tugged his head down impatiently, catching Lee’s lips with his.

Lee stilled inside of him.

Gaara made a noise of frustration.

“I said _don’t_ stop.”

“You said _‘do not_ ‘!” Lee protested.

“ _Lee,”_ Gaara hissed, very close to swearing.

“Alright, alright!” Lee muttered, sinking back into him with a little impatient motion that made Gaara gasp then groan.

“ _Yes_ ...” he hissed, pleasure tingling warm fingers of sensation up his back and across his scalp. He shivered. Moaned as Lee carefully kissed at the join of his neck and shoulder and Gaara's head knocked down close to his ear, breathing against the salt of Lee’s skin. His hands found the back of Lee’s neck, petting unthinkingly at his hair, rubbing his fingers through it as Lee kept slowly moving against that- that _thing._ That _place._

Gaara wondered idly where Lee had learned to move slow and hard inside another man. If he should be jealous. 

“Is this the first time for you?” Gaara whispered.

Lee stilled immediately.

Gaara made an irritated noise.

“I _said-_ “

_“I heard you!_ ” Lee squawked, shoulders back up around his ears so he looked rather like an embarrassed turtle. “If I am unsatisfactory at this you may simply say so-!”

“You’re _not_ ,” Gaara grumbled.

“I-“ Lee’s eyes opened, startled. “I am not?”

“I was asking _because_ it’s good.” Gaara sighed. “Or it _was._ Before you stopped.”

Lee stared at him, then looked down at the two of them, gawking. Finally he blushed, shaking his head hard.

“Is it _really_ satisfactory to you for us to be making love in this way?”

Gaara sighed.

“I just said so.”

Lee’s hands drew down, his expression thunderous, turtle mouth drawn into a grim line.

“But is there not some other technique? Some physical jutsu Shinobi use to promote the pleasure of their partner-?”

“I don’t know anything about that,” Gaara muttered, crossing his arms and sliding a little back in Lee’s lap.

“But you must-“

“It’s my first time too.”

The flush of blood crept down Lee’s skin in a rush. He pulled Gaara back bodily to look at him.

“ _REALLY_ _?!_ “

Gaara grimaced at the volume.

“You think I do this a lot?”

“Well- I-“ Lee boggled at him. “You are so _handsome_ and so-“

“I wanted to do this with you,” Gaara frowned.

“I was very honored you chose me to-“

“No,” Gaara cut him off. “I wanted to do this with _you._ Just you.”

Lee’s expression scrunched. His eyes got very wide, then went watery.

“ _Oh._ ”

Gaara considered him for a moment, considered Lee’s very beautiful, very brown body, considered his capable hands, and his scars. His open, honest face, which radiated such sincere emotion even an expert in defense couldn’t keep from opening up to him.

“You didn’t know?”

“I- What?! _No_ _?_ ”

Gaara stared at him.

“That was why I kept asking you to dinner. Lee, it’s been months.”

Lee’s tears spilled over.

He had both hands over his mouth.

Gaara sighed.

“I didn’t realize this was a point of misunderstanding.”

“N-No-! It is-“

“You’re a very attractive Shinobi-“

“I did not- _R-Really_ _?!_ ” Lee’s mouth fell open. “You really think that I am _handsome_?“

Gaara stared at him. At the both of them, naked, in Lee’s bed together.

He frowned.

“Obviously.”

Lee made a very high noise. He was crying harder now.

“ _Oh_ _!_ ”

Gaara frowned harder. He was starting to feel a little flicker of irritation mingling with his disbelief.

“You made me _dinner_. I brought you a cactus-“

“It is a very beautiful cactus!” Lee stammered, blubbering through his tears.

He wasn’t getting it.

“It took a long time to find one with orange flowers. It matched your scarf and made me think of you.”

“ _Oh!_ ” Lee sobbed, fat tears spilling over his mismatched knuckles.

Gaara’s mouth thinned into a line.

Even wiping at the trickle of snot from his nose Lee was very beautiful. Open. Everything about him promising safety. Understanding somehow.

“We _discussed_ having sex,” Gaara pointed out, a clipped edge entering his voice that usually only came out in particularly tedious meetings, “ _Extensively_. We agreed how to go about it and what to procure. Why did you agree if you didn’t think this was a romantic gesture?”

“I did not think- I am just so-!”

Gaara sighed.

Lee’s hands drew down, cautiously resting on Gaara’s bare waist.

He blubbered a bit more, staring at him.

  
Gaara waited.

“I simply did not think a Shinobi of your caliber would be interested in anything- uhm. _Serious_. With-“

“With you,” Gaara finished, frowning deeply. “What other sort of arrangement could this possibly be? Who else would I possibly want in this way?”

Lee’s lower lip drew in. Two fresh tears leaked from his eyes.

Gaara sighed.

He rubbed at the bone of Lee’s wrist awkwardly.

Telling Lee not to cry wouldn’t keep Lee from crying.

The thought of being in this position and _not_ being serious was a bit bewildering to Gaara.

“Oh! Oh I am just so happy! C-Can we- please overlook this misunderstanding?” Lee stammered.

“Yes,” Gaara inhaled through his nose. He’d softened. His ass was starting to remember it was sore and he could feel the start of a low, throbbing headache at the base of his neck. He was tired. He was _always_ tired. “Of course. Provided there is no further misunderstanding-“

“No! I-! I feel as though I understand completely now-!”

Gaara frowned at him.

“Are you _sure_?”

“Yes! Yes! I am- I am just rather overwhelmed even _considering-_ “

“I don’t know if this thing I feel towards you is love,” Gaara said, studying him closely. “I feel you deserve to be told that much. I may never be capable of feeling something like the love others feel naturally.”

Lee’s mouth opened. Shut. His eyes softened.

“But I _do_ want this with you,” Gaara said, a hesitance working its way into him for the first time. “That much I’m certain of. If that’s alright.”

He squeezed Gaara’s hands.

“I… I believe that you have communicated your intentions most admirably and honorably! It was my misunderstanding and the fault was my own!”

Gaara studied him hard.

“...I’d like to continue,” he murmured.

Lee reddened, visibly brightening.

“You- You _would?_ ”

Gaara nodded.

He studied the floor. Something worrying fluttering around inside of him. He had to think a moment before he could put his finger on it.

His hands tightened.

“If there is a love that I can learn. I think you’re the best person to learn it from. Someone capable of embracing an enemy. Capable of the impossible.”

Lee breathed out.

He was so silent for a moment Gaara wondered if he’d overstepped. Said something he shouldn’t.

Lee’s hands squeezed his more tightly.

“That is not a thing which can be duplicated by _effort,_ Gaara. It is simply a feeling. Like- Like the affection I feel when I see you in my village or-“

He faltered at the look on Gaara’s face, mirroring the widening of his eyes. They stared at one another for a moment.

“Wh-What? What is it?”

“You’re really that happy to see me when I visit?” Gaara breathed.

“What? Yes! Yes of course I am! And I have- I have treasured our times together! And it made me so very nervous that you would come to me for help with- with _this_ when I have not-“

Gaara’s eyes narrowed.

He squeezed Lee’s hands back. Lee cut off with a little startled noise.

“I didn’t come to you to satisfy my curiosity, Lee, I came to you because I wanted _you_.”

He doesn’t know how to communicate that. That vital difference. The indescribable thing that makes Lee so different. That makes him want to look at him. That makes him _keep_ looking when Lee’s in any varying states of undress, or just displaying some terribly obvious emotion all over his expressive face.

That wanting to be _closer_ and _closer_ …

The thing that flew in the face of his instinct for self-protection.

_I want you._

Lee’s mouth hung open for a moment, then snapped shut. He went red to the ears again.

His hands pulled back, covering his flushed face.

“Y-Yes- I- I am beginning to realize that now.” He muttered into his fingers.

“I _still_ want you.” Gaara murmured, studying the bow of his bare back. “Enough to frighten a less brave person, I think.”

Lee’s eyes went soft, a little sad, peering up through his fingers.

“You do not frighten me. You would not- _No._ Gaara _. No._ ”

Gaara said nothing.

There weren’t words for that kind of gratitude.

He stared at the rumpled bedding. The bend of Lee’s brown knee. The bruises at the cap of it, dark under Lee’s sun-loved skin.

“I don’t have a problem with learning to do this together, either,” Gaara murmured.

“That is easy for you to say when you are a _genius,_ ” Lee grumbled, rubbing his nose with the heel of his hand.

Gaara’s lip twitched. He snuck a glance at him.

“I have resources for you if you’re curious, but some are in Old Sunan-“

“What-? Oh! No! Please do not-! I could _never!_ It was bad enough-!”

Gaara snorted, pushing his nose into the join of Lee’s neck.

“Then this is fine.”

“It- Oh. _Oh_. But-“

Gaara turned towards him wordlessly, and Lee’s protests faded into an incoherent sputter. He shifted on the bed, drawing closer to him. Cautious, and yet determined. Gaara gazed steadily at him, smiled when Lee leaned in and let them touch, forehead resting against Gaara’s, hands carefully rubbing at the insides of his elbows with his thumbs.

He made a small contented noise.

“I- I do not think you will ever frighten me again. You are- You are very _precious_ to me, Gaara. I care for you most deeply and sincerely.”

Gaara breathed out. He could _smell_ Lee. Could see the caution in his eyes. The reduction of himself hoping he would be something palatable and safe.

The way that self-reduction _spoke_ to Gaara, who was used to holding back parts of himself perhaps more than any living shinobi.

The part of him that still stared when he saw Lee removing his weights and then his clothes... something that should have been dangerous. A weightless Lee was too fast to defend against, and had been even when they were children. He was an even bigger weakness of Gaara’s as an adult.

_I want you. I’m not sure, but I might want you even if it destroys me._

Gaara rolled his forehead slightly against Lee’s.

“You should understand you don’t have to be so careful with me. I won’t break like one of your gates.”

A flicker of guilt flashed through Lee’s face at that. He squeezed Gaara’s arm. That face. That was concern.

If anyone had the ability to teach love, it had to be Lee.

Gaara studied him closely, searching the whole of his open, sincere face. The flickers of guilt there. The depth of his care. The new uncertainty meshed over the old. The strong, capable, broken and remade body, and most of all, his _closeness_ , the way he leaned so his forehead brushed against Gaara’s, gaze darting from his eyes to his lips like there was still shyness necessary between them.

This _thing_ between them.

Certainly something. And something mutual. But...love?

Gaara squeezed his arm.

He wanted Lee to kiss him.

Lee didn’t, still staring like he needed permission. Like Gaara was some untouchable pillar of sand.

He _wanted_ to love Lee. That was the thing he couldn’t explain. He wanted to be able to. To be the kind of person who could. A normal, whole, unencumbered person. A person who loved and could be loved in return.

Lee was a wonderful human being. A brilliant shinobi. He deserved to be loved. To be loved completely. To be held, and watched over, and have someone make sure he wasn’t weeping in his sleep.

(He hasn’t seen Lee sleep yet...)

He deserved to be _happy._ Gaara was sure of that much, as much as he was sure he wanted to see Lee naked, wanted to feel him unleash everything he could do on him. Was sure, frustratingly, and simultaneously, that Lee wouldn’t.  
  


(He still hasn’t.)

“May I please kiss you?” Lee whispered. His long eyelashes were very low and his eyes were very dark.

A hand seemed to squeeze deep inside Gaara’s chest. And old, slow pain.

He was _beautiful_.

He deserved to be loved.

“ _Yes_ ,” Gaara breathed back, Lee’s silky hair sticking to the scar in his forehead, catching on a promise Gaara regretted making to himself and might never be able to break. “ _Of course.”_

_Please do._

He did. Strangely polite, as Lee always was.

A touch of his lips like he was testing, then another kiss. Gaara’s fingers drawing him closer, opening his mouth against Lee’s.

Lee made a little noise, eyelashes fluttering against Gaara’s cheeks.

His tongue grazed Gaara’s. Almost meekly.

Gaara buried his hands in his hair, leaning into him in earnest, drawing him closer.

Lee’s hands drew lower, carefully circling the ridges of his hips with his thumbs, and Gaara hardened again. Just like that. With Lee’s tongue in his mouth and his hands on him, with his fingers curled a little too tightly in Lee’s soft, dark hair.

He’d wanted him longer than he’d had the words for the emotion. A need that was impossible to describe. The ache of pining even with Lee beside him. Even with Lee _inside_ him. Like it wasn’t enough. Would never be enough. Like he was too broken to be filled even if Lee was an endless, liquid thing that might keep trying.

He _wanted_...

Gaara took the time while Lee was occupied with his lips to rearrange them both, pushing Lee down onto his back, so his belly lay flush with Gaara’s own. He stared mutely, with equal parts wonder and skittishness as Gaara adjusted his balls more comfortably against the muscles of Lee’s belly, dropping his mouth to the cords of Lee’s neck, to one of the firm but less peaked brown nipples, biting at it.

Lee gave a yelp but his cock jumped to attention so suddenly it hit Gaara in the ass and Gaara almost laughed.

It was almost funny, in a sad sort of way.

Lee so gentle and so eager and Gaara so empty and hungry. So _needing_ for all the veneers he put on it.

Lee’s face was red in embarrassment and arousal and his mouth was still soft and pink from kissing and Gaara _trusted_ him absolutely. Wanted him painfully.

He took Lee’s strong wrists in his hands, pinning them by his sides.

Lee didn’t look like he had any objections at all. If anything, for all his strength, he _relaxed_.

A Shinobi from a rival nation, who was close enough to kill, and he _relaxed._

The thing inside Gaara's chest twisted again. Not quite pain. He didn’t know if it was love.

It _hurt_ like the thing that had been close to love in him. The thing that had broken when Yashamaru had told him he’d been glad to try and kill him.

_Loneliness_.

Gaara’s fingers squeezed Lee’s wrists.  
  


Lee was warm beneath him. Grounding.

He felt the weight of that warm, trusting stare on him.

His horrible, empty hunger fighting against the reality beneath him.

Lee stared up at him with his enormous dark eyes.

The sincere affection in that look took the edge off the horrible howl inside Gaara.

  
“Are you certain you are alright?” Lee whispered.

Gaara wasn’t certain of anything. He’d sworn to love himself once, and even that he was uncertain of with a man underneath him who could kill him with a finger but let himself be pinned.

What good was a perfect self-love if it left you untouched?

He didn’t answer Lee’s question.

Gaara breathed, gazing down at Lee. Lee, who could break free from something like this in a moment. With scarcely an effort. Who didn’t. Maybe wouldn’t. Maybe never would.

  
Part of Gaara hoped he never would.

“Yes. Now... _Continue.”_

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> ‘Sup, I’m Skuun, and I think you should talk to me about Lee’s Inferiority Complex and Gaara’s Perpetual Lineface of Arousal on Tumblr. Especially while I try to pretend I’m not dismayed this is probably my first finished GaaLee work posted to the site.


End file.
